God: The Ultimate Lie Detector

I started the book of Numbers recently and I’ll be honest, I was not super excited.  Talk about a lack-luster introduction… God says, “Hey Moses, go count all the people.”  And thus, we hear names and numbers for the rest of the first chapter.  I thought to myself, I could just skip Numbers – the details about how the Israelite camp should be set up and the duties of the priests and the number of the clans – and no one would know.  I’ll move onto something more exciting and if anyone asks, I’ll just say I skimmed it.

Here’s the thing: God knows E.V.E.R.Y.T.H.I.N.G.  I mean, it’s not like I will get points for reading it or not reading it, but when I stumbled onto Numbers 5, I learned that God is actually the inventor of the first ever “lie-detector.” This is stunning.  Ok, please take 3 minutes and go read Numbers 5:11-31.

As it turns out, people have been lying about their activities since nearly the beginning.  God and Moses are talking and God says, “Hey Moses (They talk like friends do.), if a man thinks his wife has cheated on him with another man and if she’s all like, I didn’t do it and denies it…  well then, here’s what you do...”  God tells him to mix of a potion of bitter water that includes the holy water AND dust from the floor of the tabernacle (tasty!).  Well, you’ve already read it so you know the process God explained.  Here are verses 27-28:

“If she has made herself impure and been unfaithful to her husband, this will be the result: When she is made to drink the water that brings a curse and causes bitter suffering, it will enter her, her abdomen will swell and her womb will miscarry, and she will become a curse.  If, however, the woman has not made herself impure, but is clean, she will be cleared of guilt and will be able to have children. (NIV)”

God says, have her drink the water and what happens next will tell you whether she’s lying or not! There’s nothing to measure the heart-rate or the sweat production.  There are no wires to hook up or plug in…  Just good old-fashioned God running every detail of the universe to reveal the truth. 

People, we have been trying for years and, often times, we are able to get our lies by the people around us.  If we’re really good at it, we can keep them for a really long time (even from the people closest to us) and it’s almost like they are true (after a while anyway)! But Numbers 5 is a great reminder that God knows all.  We can’t lie to him.  I mean, we can try to keep on the mask, but he knows just how dusty water will affect us when we drink it.  We’ll be exposed for the sinners we are.

And so, Romans 5:6, 8 & 11 shine brightly into this dismal situation:

For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly….God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us… More than that, we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.

Jesus Christ is ALWAYS good news.  He is Gospel.

So, I’m hooked on Numbers now.

Alive.

This one phrase says it all, “And the people became impatient on the way.” Numbers 21:4 begins the narrative of the people as they wandered through the desert in the Middle East. The next few verses of the chapter describe what happened as a result of their impatience:

And the people spoke against God and against Moses, “Why have you brought us up out of Egypt to die in the wilderness? For there is no food and no water, and we loathe this worthless food.” Then the Lord sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people, so that many people of Israel died. And the people came to Moses and said, “We have sinned, for we have spoken against the Lord and against you. Pray to the Lord, that he take away the serpents from us.” So Moses prayed for the people.  And the Lord said to Moses, “Make a fiery serpent and set it on a pole, and everyone who is bitten, when he sees it, shall live.”  So Moses made a bronze serpent and set it on a pole. And if a serpent bit anyone, he would look at the bronze serpent and live.

The people of Israel, much like myself, had become impatient along the way and began telling God just how it should be.  They were breaking a number of the commandments He had given them as protection.  They were selfish.  They were honoring themselves above God.  They were not thankful.  They were sinners.  And they saw it.  Verse 7 says that they admitted their sins to Moses and desired to be free from them. 

God, in mercy, devised a way for them to live!  He had Moses make a fiery serpent (seems pretty easy, right?  Let me just go whip up a fiery serpent!) and raise it up on a pole.  Whoever looked on the serpent would live.

Fast Forward.

John 3:16… the most known verse of the Bible starts: “For God so loved the world,” I’d be willing to bet the “so” here isn’t like “so much” (though He does love us so much). It’s more like… “In this way, God loved the world” or “This is how God loved the world”… and it’s connected to verses 14 and 15 previously, which say, “And as Moses lifted up the serpent in the wilderness, so must the Son of Man be lifted up, that whoever believes in him may have eternal life.”

Jesus is our serpent.  We are sinners.  Every single one of us.  But God loved us.  He made a way for us to live.  John 3:14 says that Jesus was lifted up (hung on a tree-like cross) that whoever “looks on him” (read: believes in him) will not die, but live.

This is the best, most freeing news in the world!  Let the glory of Christ on that tree dying your death sink into your heart today. When we admit that we are sinners and ask Jesus to save us, believing in Him, He will deliver us from our sin and the death it brings.

And you, who were dead in your trespasses …, God made alive together with him, having forgiven us all our trespasses, by canceling the record of debt that stood against us with its legal demands. This he set aside, nailing it to the cross.  Colossians 2:13-14 ESV

Happy Easter everyone!

God’s Plan Trumps My Faithlessness

Man, Genesis is completely chock-full of amazing narratives… like, you aren’t quite sure if there will be destruction or love or both somehow – and I’ve even read it before!  So, as I encounter new characters in these pages, I am asking myself these questions: Why is this person introduced by God in His book?  What can I learn from them? Should I seek to follow their example or do the opposite?

I found two characters in mid-book that seem to teach me the same thing: Lot & Hagar.

Lot’s story is found in Genesis 19 (take a peak).  It’s twisted.  So, Lot lives in this wicked city called Sodom.  And this city is so wicked that God is going to destroy it, but Lot is righteous so God sends two angels to him to warn him to take his family and flee the city before God destroys it.  As these men are in Lot’s house, some men of the city come and ask to see these men so that they can do harm to them.  Lot (so righteous) offers the wicked men his virgin daughters instead so that the men from God are not violated.   This is a rabbit trail to the point I’m trying to make though…

Verse 15 ff: Morning comes and the angels tell Lot to take his family and get out.  And here it is: “But he lingered…”  It’s like Lot doesn’t believe them.  Then it says, “So the men seized him by the hand, the Lord being merciful to him, and they brought him out and set him outside the city.” Again, the angels told them to flee and not look back – head for the hills (literally) and Lot disagrees AGAIN! Lot says, “Thanks for saving me, but I can’t live in the hills!” 

And then there is Hagar – the maid of Sarah, Abraham’s wife.  Now Sarah wasn’t giving any children to Abraham even though God said that Abraham would be the father to a great nation… so Sarah gives her servant, Hagar, to Abraham to bear his child.  (Truly, there is nothing new under the sun, eh?)  Again, not the point (just the crazy back story)…

In Genesis 21, Abraham sends Hagar and her son Ishmael away at the request of Sarah (women!). He gives her a skin full of water and she heads out to wander in the wilderness.  She just wandered.  And she and her son drank the water.   Pretty aimless.  When the water was all gone, Hagar pretty much assumed that she was doomed.  So, she put her son under some bushes and then left him… going a ways away so that she wouldn’t have to watch him die.  (I’m serious, this is all in the text – go read Genesis 21: 14-21.)  She’s given up on life… for herself and for her son… because… well, there is no more water. 

Then God steps in, in the midst of her lack of faith, just like he stepped in for Lot even though Lot didn’t believe the men He had sent.  God hears the little boy crying and goes to Hagar.  He promises her that he will make her son into a great nation.  When she opened her eyes, she saw a well.  There is provision.  There is hope again.

Both Lot and Hagar show me that God is sovereign over all things, even my choice to believe or not.  He’s going to protect Lot if He wants to. He’s going to provide for Hagar if He wants to.  And He’s going to do these things in the midst of their unbelief… because He is God.  It got me thinking about my own life and what God might be doing even while I’m not believing Him. Is He doing something in yours?

He's got this, all this, all the time

One of the not so wonderful souvenirs that I returned to the States from Austria with was a torn ACL in my left knee. I was spending some quality time on a trampoline in the Alps near Salzburg, Austria and well... I guess they say you should always watch the landing.  I knew something was wrong with my knee almost immediately, but I wasn't sure if it was permanent or just something that I needed to "walk off." So, I wandered around Innsbruck for another 4 days before heading up to Munich for some more wandering.  Then, I got on a plane with all of my luggage and lived in the States for a week before I decided I had better just get that checked out to be sure.
 

With my mom recently having both knees replaced, my family has an orthopedic guy sort of on call.  The news of a complete tear hit hard, mostly because I knew that I would have to get it fixed and the uncertainty of that was pretty overwhelming.  Then came grief... over the fact that, even with surgery, my knee would never probably be 100% again. There was some "I'm getting old" talk in there and finally, I came to accept this as a new adventure - one called ACL surgery and recovery.  I guess that every exit is an entrance somewhere else, right?  I'm really trying to see opportunity in this, instead of another several weeks off of work, followed by some pretty intense physical therapy.
 

At this point, I can walk pretty easily with my knee.  It's in the plan to bike after I hit "post" here. Stairs are not super fun, basically because my left knee just feels really unstable when I put any sort of weight on it or try to balance on it. I do some range of motion exercises daily just to keep things loose and my other ligaments from getting tight or weak.  Probably the most painful thing that has happened to me was the instinctive reaction to stepping in gum with my left foot... twisting and grinding it into the pavement (twisting that mainly comes from the knee!) to get the gum off. Yowsers!  Did that smart, or what?!

Surgery is scheduled for June 28th. It won't take long - maybe 1.5 hours - and then the fun begins. Things on my downtime list: Reading, writing, helping at Riverside however I can, crafting, playing Scrabble with my mom, moving from one apartment to another (i know, right?), hopefully writing some more. 
 

I didn't want to spend my summer in a brace, being driven to and from rehab appointments.  I didn't want to meet my insurance deductible this year. I didn't want to give up things like slacklining, roofball, ultimate frisbee, or biking this summer. I didn't want to lose my God-given ACL to one He gave someone else.  BUT. I'm grateful for family and friends who are going to pitch in and help.  I'm thankful that I had health insurance so that I'm not footing the whole bill. I'm fortunate to be able explore other interests while I'm recouping toward those activities again. And I'm really glad that God has given wisdom to doctors and others to be able to reconstruct my knee.  He is good and He's got this, all this, all the time.

Magnificent May... The First of Many Memories

When Fabi left in the end of May, the summer was before me and I just knew that I would not have sufficient time to write well about our time together.  So, I began vomiting all over my computer, making lists of experiences to flesh out one at a time as I had time.  I forced myself to write some each day no matter how tired I happened to be at the end of it.  It has been a rejuvenating process of reflection so far!  Over the next few weeks and months, you’ll find little snippets of this ever-growing document.   I’ll share funny stories, serious stories, pictures & thoughts about the trip of my recent lifetime with Fabi…

Overlooking the Bright Angel Trail

We watched our first sunset in that perfectly secluded spot overlooking the Bright Angel Trail from the Hermit’s Rest Rim Trail.  We had our Grand Canyon brewed beer while watching the canyon, having opened our beer with the canyon rim!  It was beyond words to see that beauty.  I was reading in Isaiah (2:10-17).  It’s the section that talks about the lofty/proud being brought low.  Some of the examples included nature – like the cedars of Lebanon.  I guess they were some famous and magnificent Cedars in Lebanon.  It made me think of the power of God to crush the Grand Canyon flat in but a moment, a word.  God gives us amazing beauty here to enjoy here on earth, but to read that God will destroy it for one purpose – showing His glorious wrath and making all men look to Him alone.  Wow.  Anyway, it was a precious time for me to spend that sunset with God and Fabian. 

Looking north at the Colorado River from Desert Views

On our way back to the car, we talked about our Bright Angel hike scheduled for the next day.  Would we go all the way to the river or turn back part way?  In a moment of sheer stupid and awesome brilliance, Fabi asked me if I would yell my debit card pin number to him as I was falling over the edge of the canyon if I ever did.  How thoughtful of him! (geez!) So, I yelled seven-two-fiiiiive-niiiiiiiiinnnnnnne… and we laughed hysterically (Mind you, I told him the correct pin, not this stand in for public use.).   He scrambled for paper when I told him that I had actually just then and there told him my correct pin number. Thanks for thinking of what little money I had in my bank account over and above my life! 

Infuse. Ignited for Christ

I've been working like a mad woman on a set of talks that I will be presenting this weekend at Riverside's winter retreat for youth.  The theme for the week is Infuse: Ignited for Christ.  After getting over the hump of completely blank thoughts, I have hammered out some thoughts on our lives, God's plan for things, darkness and light and various other topics.  

I've learned so much in my preparation.  By far, the biggest thing is that if this goes off without hitch, it will be because of the Lord.  If this goes off with a hitch or two, the Lord will use it in His way.

Pray that God's purposes might stand.  Pray that all hearts would be open to understand.  Pray that God would let us see Him and ignite our hearts!

Patience.

The topic of our small group's conversation last night was James 5:7-11, where it talks about being patient in suffering, as we wait for God's fruit to be revealed in our lives. I will admit, this is hard for me.

This year, I have been working on various scholarship applications, looking for work, trying to save money and study in preparation for graduate school in the fall.  Currently, I am waiting to hear back from all said scholarship foundations, finishing up a temporary work assignment (i.e. looking for work again), spending money on wedding celebrations that I am honored to be a part of, and getting discouraged in my studies (as well as not finding too much time for it!).  You can see why it's hard for me to be patient and wait for fruit. 


What I've been holding to since our conversation last night is James 1:2-4 which says,

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

I know that God is faithful to us, to me.  He has chosen to make me mature and complete through trials that do not make any sense in the moment. I'll be honest, I'm not in love with the methods, but God must have his reasons.  And so, I will look to be joyful as I wait patiently. 

So pray for me.

God's Unique Working

I had the opportunity to attend a baptism service yesterday. One of the most endearing parts of the service for me is the testimony time. It reminds me just how personal God is. Each of our God-Stories is so unique and personal. Some are awakened early in life, some don't know until near the end and still others will come early only to wander away before coming finally back to Him. God uses unimaginable circumstances to call each one of us to Him.

In the midst of this unique and personal work of God, there is much hope and purpose in me. I have hope for my unbelieving friends and relatives - that they might be awakened - and also hope for myself - that God is shaping me in a very intimate and personal way. He works in me like he works in no other. And there is purpose because I know that often times, God uses his servants to call others. Many of the testimonies from yesterday's service highlighted a person or two who was/were bold enough to share Christ with them. It takes all of the pressure off to realize that it's not ultimately up to me. It's up to God.

Really, this hope and purpose brought peace.

Stopping to smell the memories.

As summer starts to leave central Wisconsin, I am overloaded with memories of my first months in Austria. I wander through this field of wild flowers, stopping to smell these memories, trying to hold them awhile longer. I invite them into my cave of now.

I walked the streets of Innsbruck this week. In rain, snow and sun, I bopped in and out of shops in the Altstadt. I expertly wove my way through heaps of tourists from Japan, Europe and the States. I visited the familiar places: Tom's Gelateria, Tyrolia, Müller in the Rathhaus, and Katzung Café. I waited at bus stops, calculating stop times and planning routes between friends' flats and home. I felt every turn and bump on the J Line as it climbed toward Hungerburg. I listened to my Europe songs, in minor keys, as I bundled up once again to hike up the last 10 minutes to home: Rosnerweg 14. I sipped sour tea as I reached the Kaiser Saule, goal #2 on my first mountain trek. I overheard German, lots of it. I stumbled through some conversations myself. It was all so... so present, like I was experiencing it now again for the first time. This field of memories was sweet to meander through, to receive therapy in.

And then this morning, I woke up to rain on the roof. For a split second, I thought that I was in Innsbruck again, with the rain splattering up against my window on my basement apartment. I nestled further into my comforter and dreamt of slow mornings at the house, ironing, washing the dishes and cooking for 7 at lunch.

I finally pulled myself out of bed to make some hot chocolate [Austrian style] and then curled up with my journal and Bible. I sipped the Psalms in, settling in on chapter 10, 16-18. The LORD is king forever and ever; the nations perish from his land. [v.16] his land... All of the land I see is God's. I thought of this book I'm reading, The Kite Runner, and the oppression that Amir and his Baba faced, not to mention what Ali and Hassan met, during the Russian occupation of Afghanistan in the early 1980s. I could write for ages about how this ugliness makes me feel and think about my apathy [and the apathy of others], but the Psalms reassured me this morning that God hears the cry of the oppressed and he will defend the fatherless [10,17-18]. This earth belongs to Christ, the King, My King. I loved God then, I mean, even more [or more clearly], that He cares the most and in the best way. He cannot be apathetic.

It is these mornings, the slow lingering ones with God, that I miss most about my Austrian year. I grew so much in my dependence on Him and in realizing the humility it takes to learn life in a foreign land. God enabled each move and memory.

Thank you, LORD, for each flower in this field that I've been exploring lately!! You are so good

Love the sinner, or the sin?

In the midst news coverage exposing Bristol Palin’s teen pregnancy, I am stand at a fork in the road, asking this question: How do I continue to despise sin while accepting and reaching out to the one who sins? One the one hand, I readily desire to embrace sinful people [and myself] in love and forgiveness. On the other, I find myself becoming more and more comfortable and desensitized to sin… I become okay with it. Divorce, teen pregnancy, and lying – God hates them all – and yet, I so easily dismiss them. Vice Presidential candidate, Sarah Palin’s daughter, Bristol, made a mistake, like we all do… so I can understand that. I can sympathize with small amounts of willpower, self-control and making poor decisions. I can especially identify with being painfully exposed in my sin by the pure, gracious Light of God. But all too often, I find myself inviting sin in for an afternoon tea. I am numb to the wrongness and ugliness of disobeying God. What to do?

My only conclusion is that God has the equilibrium in this dangerous tightrope walk. Jesus does not throw stones at the sinful woman, yet he overturns the tables of the money-changers. He cares for the Samaritan woman, though she’s had five “husbands.” And if God has this ability, then doesn’t He also want me to have it and also have the ability to give it to me?

Pray that I would be able to love people toward holiness. Pray also that others would love me toward that too.

Only so many plates...

There has been a lot of shattering plates crashing down around me lately. I acquire these new plates with every new friend, ministry or adventure I take up. They are friends, people to pray for, encourage, keep up with, tell stories to, etc... I have plates living on 4 different continents, speaking at least 5 different languages. And well, I try to spin them all and keep them going.

But a girl can only spin so many plates at a time before they begin to slip out of control. It's amazing how many "back burners" I can put some of these plates on... Each one is meaningful to me. I don't want to drop any of them, but the shear number of incoming plates simply means that I must put others down. How do I gain the wisdom to know which ones to invest in? and which ones are best spun by someone else? And well, today, I'm incredibly indecisive, so I've picked up and put down nearly every single one! I am not good at spinning!

so hallelujah! God is able to spin each one of us, forever and very well! whew.